Honesty is…

Saturday January 12, 2013

Honesty is……the most important thing in the world to me. In any and every relationship.  Friends. Family. or Significant Other.

It’s something that by society standards doesn’t seem to be that important to most, but, I’m someone who once you’ve lost my trust, it’s hard to gain it back again. And I’d rather hear the icky news or have the uncomfortable conversation and deal with it, than be always questioning the other person the rest of my life.

It seems the lines have become blurred with technology and the internet and being able to make oneself look better than they may be, since they can hide behind a computer screen.  But in the end, the truth always comes out. Always.

I throw people off all the time with my brutal honesty. It’s something on the “newer” side for me, being able to be honest and just blurt it out. Not honesty that would hurt someone, but, REAL honesty. I’ve told my girlfriends time and time again, “do you want my opinion and suggestions or do you want me just to listen?” because if I’m just going to listen that’s absolutely FINE, I know they’ll tell you I CAN do that.  Ask Natalie about this one.  I just pulled it off brilliantly! 😉

But…… if you want my advice, I’m not going to sugar coat it. I’m going to tell you like it is. I always try to be tactful and classy, but, I’m not going to make up stories to get out of something, if I can’t afford to go on that trip to Vegas, I can say that.  If I don’t think your date from 6 weeks ago who had to clean out his grandma’s garage is still going to call.  And I’m definitely not going to tell you to wear something that’s unflattering just because the salesperson did! I would never be mean, I would never say it harshly, but, I’d make a suggestion on something more flattering.  IT’S WHAT I WOULD WANT IN RETURN!!!

We all need someone in our lives that will do that for us. I know I do.  I don’t know what I’d do without Arianne.  Sometimes it makes me scared to tell her the truth, but, when I do, having her support feels better than anything else. And knowing that her intentions are 100% to support and defend me.  Even the other night, we had a long talk about something very important in my life, she was very quiet. Finally I said, “I DO want your two cents, I know I may not like it……but tell me your thoughts.” and without going into detail, just like I would do for her, she told me, her reasoning for questioning what I had told her and being skeptical was because nothing makes her sadder than seeing me disappointed by someone I love and care about.  How can I not appreciate someone having my back and caring that much??

All of this really hit home for me after reading the book “He’s Just Not That Into You” by Greg Behrn of Sex & the City fame. The movie was good, but the book came out long before and really hit a nerve with me.  I’ve adopted its main principles as my mantra and believe in my heart that we are ALL better off facing the truth head-on no matter how yucky it is.

Honesty allows us to move on.  honesty allows us to feel connected.  Honesty is what bonds us.  To me, honesty is everything.  Without it, we have nothing. ❤ ~ traci xox


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