Dear July. Normally not a great month for me. A month filled with reflections. Milestones and celebrations and also the reminder of things not accomplished, paths not yet crossed. As I lay in bed this morning thinking about it, I’ve decided to take a new approach this year. Yeah, I’m turning 37. Calen is growing and will be 5, no longer the baby I was first hired to care for. My first puppy Riley will be 7, while she’s still so enthusiastic and bouncy, the number growing scares me. I can’t deny it the thought of losing her is something I can’t even talk or think about.
But instead of focusing on all of those things that pull at my heart-strings and make me feel sad, I’m going to look to the future. Next month will bring a new life to our family. A brand new baby will be coming into this world. Calen and Leah will become a big brother (again) and a big sister. And I will again be tasked and honored with the responsibility of helping to raise and love this small little person.
These children have changed me so much, and they keep me going every.single.day. The excitement and anticipation I feel for meeting my 3rd little friend is starting to build. I’ve known for a long time he/she is on it’s way, but it’s finally starting to feel real.
I can’t wait to find out if it’s a girl or a boy! I can’t wait to find out its name! I can’t wait to hold him or her for the first time and say hi. I can’t wait to watch him/her grow like I’ve gotten to watch his/her siblings. I can’t wait to find out which of his siblings he/she is most like. Or if he/she is a combo of them both since they are so different. Will it love me like its siblings do? Will it take to me like they did??
I can’t wait to have a little baby to bathe. To snuggle. To just stare at for hours & hours. To change. To take out in the world and teach things to by pointing out the world around us. To going back to stopping and smelling the flowers while teaching the baby about the colors and the textures.
Thing 3, you already have a place in my heart with your brother and sister. The 3 of you could never know and understand how much you’ve helped me grow as a person, how you’ve healed my heart and taught me things I didn’t know I needed to learn. You’ve made me a better person.
July is going to be a great month celebrating what’s been, and preparing for what’s to come………August will bring new life. New hope. And a new member of our family. How can it not be amazing??
~ traci xoxo